My neighbor is always sticking his nose in my business.
I understand that he’s just a bored old man, and he’s trying to provide some insight and wisdom to his young whippersnapper neighbor, but he’s driving me a bit insane.
It feels like he is not answering my daily schedule, no matter what I’m doing. Sometimes I’m completely minding my own business, just going to work and coming back home, and he’ll mention that I must have hit traffic that day. I got a little freaked out that he knows my schedule. Other times, I am being a bit of a hooligan and I’m worried that he’s going to catch me. Recently, I was pretty concerned that he had caught onto my experimental grow room in my house. I walked out one morning, and found him poking around by the outdoor air vents. Immediately, I was in a panic. I thought maybe the odor from inside my house was passing through the air ducts and being channeled through the outdoor air exchange nuns. I got really paranoid that he could be catching on to my indoor gardening thanks to the odorous indoor air. Instead, he came meandering over to the front door and started talking to me about the importance of proper insulation. He said he had noticed that to my doors and windows weren’t sealed extremely tightly, and worried that I might have expensive indoor air flowing out of my house. He said this was a huge waste of energy and money, because high quality indoor air cost a premium these days. He recommended that I fully insulate my house, from the attic to the basement to keep my indoor air inside. Just when I thought I was off the hook, he turned back around and with a grin, told me to watch how much wacky tobacky I was smoking.